Health and Stupidity

September 24, 2008 by Keli.

There’s nothing like an ill-timed cold sore, prominently displayed on the bottom lip, to put life in proper perspective.

I considered wearing a veil on the lower half of my face, but the sudden wardrobe shift would only heighten the curiosity of stupers (short, yet again, for corrosively stupid persons) and likely attract them in droves.

In the distant past, I’ve suffered from head-splitting migraines, vigorous teeth clenching, even a dime-sized cyst most inconveniently placed, front and center, atop my chest, as well as frayed nerves. My wall of sanity wobbled. I practically rolled out a welcome mat inviting meager minds to freely plant their idiot seeds inside my head resulting in my irritation. Without fail, every time I allowed such a disturbance, something unpleasant, a disorder or minor but vexing disfiguration, paid me a visit. I call this period, The Straightjacket Years.

As my wall became more durable, I freed myself from needless suffering and unsightly blemishes. Yet, as I sit before you, my lower lip is hosting a cold sore.

My dearest, most practical readers are probably frantically waving their arms right about now, trying desperately to get my focused attention and point out that fever blisters or cold sores are actually caused by a virus not a stuper. But I know better.

It’s true that such viruses lie dormant until triggered by fever, cold or other viral infection, exposure to sun and wind or…stress. And what kind of empty-headed, wholly dysfunctional, Darwinian nightmare promotes stress? The stuper kind.

I don’t know how many of you actually appreciate what I just did: subtly stated a hypothesis, provided evidence and confirmed it in a matter of three seconds.

When we are subjected to the inane antics of stupers or their verbal bullets, the key is to get the bullets to ricochet off yourself and hit the dullard back squarely between his glazed eyes, hopefully stimulating frozen brain cells. Either that or find a way to neutralize the assault so that you remain unaffected.

In my latest bout involving stupidity and the cold sore, the stuper involved was myself once again. My own stupidity cleared a space for the virus to land.

A few days ago, I assisted Son #2 with a Physics Lab. Physics was the only course in high school for which I received a less than exemplary mark. In all fairness, it was my last semester; I’d already been accepted to University, and I had more exciting causes to champion.

A lab that was supposed to take sixty minutes, took us four, frustration-filled hours. By hour two, I’d developed a hair-trigger temper, a sudden, alarming perfectionist complex and ultimately, a cold sore two days later. If I’d stayed open-minded and patient, we would have been fine, and I would not have regressed to stuper standing. But I panicked, undermining my own sanity and promoting stress. Now I bear the degrading stamp of the cold sore for all to view.

Many modern ailments are the result of mental distress and disturbances. Our state of mind affects our health and produces maladies. I offer Exhibit A: Myself.

Our negative thoughts and emotions permit the entry of germs and viruses into our body in what is referred to by medical experts as lowered resistance. The opposite is also true.

Often issues that seem momentarily important change over time. Was it more important for me to enjoy time spent with my child or to build a mechanically correct replica of a calorimeter out of Styrofoam cups? It’s imperative to evaluate situations with clarity and wisdom in order to stave off stress and maintain sanity.

Think.

Keli

Keli@counterfeithumans.com

Posted in My very own stupidity, Plain Old Fashioned Stupidity | 9 Comments »